money/dance
2003-04-01||xx||5:26 pm
Hi!
Well, some April Fools Day. The idea that it's over by 12 really bothers me. Whoever came up with that is probably some old crabby person who doesn't want kids to have any fun.
Anyway.. oh btw, I got rid of my tagboard since it was hidden by my template, so I got a guestbook instead. You can leave me a message in there, or under 'notes', if you want to.
Today wasn't too bad, there was a rehearsal for the modern piece today at lunch, it was funish, but hardly anyone showed up.. It's going to look so bad if that's all the people who end up coming! Hopefully most people just forgot today, and will come next week.
Nothing major, but I woke up with a sore throat this morning and have been feeling a little sick all throughout the day.. when I got on the bus after school, it reeked of weed and was making me feel sick, so I had to get off. most people probably think that's really stupid but.. anyway, I called my mom and she picked me up.
My mom told me something this morning that made me worried.. Dad got an unpleasant surprise yesterday, to do with money.. and now I'm worried, and I feel bad asking for money. For anything, I mean. Even things he's already agreed to (RWB, SF, & YC). I even feel bad accepting a paycheck from him, which is of course ridiculous, since I honestly earned all that money by working.
I feel bad for costing my parents money. And I feel like a nuisance for asking for money. I mean, I never just ask them for money, like in cash or something, I earn money that way by myself. I mean paying for things. Any things. Everything.
I wish I could help, and the only ways I could help would be:
a) working for Dad, so he would have more time to do other things, and the work would get done.. but in reality, I don't know how much it would help, because then he would have to pay me. And I'm really busy right now so I can't really afford to work for free. But atleast if I did work, it would show that I care and am trying to help.
b) just try not to ask for much .. except that it just so happens that right now, like within the next few months, are all these fantastic opportunities and things going on that realistically DO cost money!
RWB (the ballet thing in August)
SF (going to San Francisco with Donetta in July)
YC (youth convention, may 17-19.. I'm paying for more than 25% of it, though..)
Burn the Floor (april 12th, i was definitely going to offer to pay for some of my ticket, but hopefully not all. now i dont want to ask for any money..)
Shopping -- just in general, I need to buy myself some things. This would of course come from my own money, but if I have to spend my own money on things that I usually wouldn't have had to spend it on, then I won't have enough money to buy myself other things that I need.)
And so I can certainly forget about any sort of possibility of going out to Ontario to see Sophia this summer. Dammit! So frustrating.. but it will pass. We'll just have to skimp on some things for awhile now.
I told my mom this morning that if they needed any money they could have all my savings, and she said that although that was really nice and generous, it wouldn't help much.
But we'll be fine.. it's not like we're going to be bankrupt or go into a huge debt. It just sorta sucks. Anyway..
I wish I could get another job, other than working for Dad, cuz then he wouldn't have to pay me, and I could support myself more. The problem is, that I have a hectic, spontaneous schedule. Tuesday and Thursday is ballet, and then some weekends I go to Surrey. So my working schedule would be too complicated, and my employer would probably get fed-up, cuz working every other day isn't very efficient, and pretty soon I would probably get fired.
So I guess there isn't much I can do except be nice to my parents and not give them a hard time, not complain when Dad needs me to work, and help more around the house. And support myself as much as possible.
As for all these expenses he already agreed to.. well I'll just have to talk to him about them.
On a brighter note, Ms. Langer talked to me today about a new dance piece she wants to choreograph, to go along with some music the Concert Band on Saltspring is playing.. (Mr. Astill and Mr. Curtis play in it! lol) The piece would be performed at Artspring, I guess sometime in June? I don't completely understand what's going on, lol, but she said she wants 8 'more experienced dancers' to dance in it. So she asked me to, if I want to, and I don't know who else she's going to ask. I'd imagine maybe Metta, Jekka, and Janie, because their trio (Anonymous) was amazing.. and Ms. Langer said it would be a modern dance. I'm not so sure about Morgan, only because she didn't even show up to the ballet piece practice on friday or the modern piece practice today. But I hope she starts showing up, she's really good and I hope she does this new dance too so I won't be all alone, lol. So.. yeah.. should be interesting! Anyway, that's it for now!
~Ann